Playgrounds and serial killers don't mix.

Park City, Kansas is going to build a playground on the site of Dennis Rader's former home (he lives in jail now because he killed 10 people).

The house will be demolished before spring and turned into an entryway to Jardine Memorial Park, a small park with swings and a basketball court, Stuart said.

Everybody knows you don't build playgrounds on serial killer dirt. That's like building a subdevelopment on an Indian burial ground. But I'm guessing that no kid will visit Bind, Torture, Kill Memorial Park, anyways. First, it's small, apparently, with only swings and a basketball court. Basketball is for losers, and if a park ain't got no tire swing, it ain't no park at all, as James Brown, the late Godfather of Soul, once said. More importantly, kids are spooked by fucking squirrels. At least I was. But only because I thought they were all rabid. No self-respecting kid is going to risk the ghost of BTK for a swingset.

I used to play in a wooden park. It had turrets and tunnels and swinging bridges. A tire swing, too. But the coolest part about this park was a patch of bushes behind it. There were well-worn footpaths through the low bushes, and kids used to play tag and hide-and-seek inside. It was a kiddy-sized forest.

Then someone told me that crack dealers liked to lurk inside, waiting for children. I never went back. If I thought a ghost was waiting to bind, torture, and kill, I wouldn't go within a mile of the park, nevermind actually enter it.